Love--such a little word with so many nuances! Love is used to describe how we feel about pizza, a movie, our God, and our family. I want to change how I love this year. With one year to live, I don't want to misuse that word and I want to make sure that I love as how God wants me to love. I don't want to be flip in how I use the word, . I don't want to say I love pizza or a movie or any thing. I like those things, but they are not something I am willing to lay down my life for. This word should be reserved for only the dearest and most important people in my life, but it goes much deeper than that.
The greatest commandment in the Bible is "Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind." I can feel pretty smug about this verse until I look at the rest of the story (verse). "And the second is like it: "Love your neighbor as yourself. All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments." I do love God, Jesus and the Spirit, and each day I hope to love and grow in that Love, but it is the second part of this verse that gets me. I fall short of loving my neighbor. I ask, "Who is my neighbor?" Well, it's anyone that God has allowed my path to cross. This is where I fall so short.
I have unconditional love for my immediate family. They are not perfect, and sometimes we hurt each other, but at the bottom, I would give my life for them. I choose to overlook when they hurt me because I hope they do the same for me. I want to extend to them the grace that has been given me by the blood of Jesus, but there are others in my extended family that are not as easy to love. You know the ones. They don't fit the peg I try to place them in. They don't do what I want them to do, or they don't act like I think they should, or even worse, they do very unloveable things. I can then extend this out to ones I attend church with, that I work with, and the list goes on and on.
In I John 4:20-21 states that if I say I love God, yet do not love my brother, then I am liar. For if I cannot love my brother whom I have seen, how can I love God whom I have not seen. Whoever loves God must love his brother. This is the challenge.
This year I am committed to loving the unloveable in my life. I do not have to like what they do, how they are, and I certainly do not have to hang out with them, but I am called to love them. For some people this may be easy, but for me it may mean forgiving them for hurting me, it may mean looking at them and accepting who they are--a person made in the image of God. I know that the devil will do his best to defeat me in this area because one of his biggest weapons is creating division. He loves it when we do not love. Creating hate and dissension is what he is all about.
The greatest gift of Love was given to us by God: His only begotten Son, who laid down his life for all of humanity. His love is perfect. This is what I want to remain focused on.
With one year to live, I do not want to stand before God and answer for not loving the way I should. I know that this will not be easy. I am human, afterall, but I am going to try and look at each one in my life as a soul that needs to know Jesus, and when I am feeling those feelings of anger, dislike and distrust, I am going to stop right there and pray for God to help me defeat the evil one, and to help me love this person because it will only be through HIM that I will accomplish this.
Love,
Monday, January 30, 2012
Friday, January 27, 2012
Blogs
I do not like blogs. You may think that is hypocritical since I am writing on this blog, but let me explain. The journalist in me has always liked to know what others think. I love a good discussion, whether it is at church, at the job, with friends or family. I love to hear what other people think. I have had some very spirited conversations with my friends. We always do not see all things alike, and that is okay. It gives me the opportunity to look at things from someone else's perspective, and hopefully they feel the same. We never walk away from each other angry, and because we are friends, we know we can be open and honest, and we will be loved and accepted.
Since I like to see what others are thinking about things happening in our culture, if I am on the Dallas Morning News web site, or Fox News, or anyother site, I will often look at the comments just to see what others think. For the last six months, this has become more and more discouraging. On most blogs, people are not using their real names. The things that some of these people say are down right disgusting. They are really not contributing any useful comments or information. It's usually a tirade against a person, organization, or group. I have asked myself many times, "When did we as a people become so mean spirited? Would people say these things if they were not cloaked under anonymity?" I personally don't think they would say these denigrating remarks to someone's face. Needless to say, it has driven me away from looking at these comments.
Some people will throw the First Amendment out that they have the right to speak, but just because a person has a right, they do not have to exercise it. Words should be taken with deep regard and with wisdom and discernment.
One of the scariest verses in the Bible is Matt. 12:36. "But I tell you that men will have to give account on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken." I have said a lot of careless words in my life. I didn't think before I spoke. As I live this year, I want to be very careful of what comes out of my mouth. I want to think before I speak. I want to ask myself, "Is this encouraging or discouraging? Will this build someone up, or will it tear them down?"
Our words are so important, and once they are out there, you cannot bring them back. My favorite American woman poet is Emily Dickinson. She wrote a little poem: "A word is dead when said some say. I say it just begins to live that day." All of us have had things said to us that we have never forgotten. Some have been wonderful and kind things, but we all remember those terribly ugly things said too. Words have the power to slice us to our deepest part.
I cannot control the people who comment on blogs, but I can control whether I choose to read them or not. With one year to live, I am really not too interested in what strangers have to say. I just want to make sure that what comes out of my mouth only builds up and encourages.
Peace,
Since I like to see what others are thinking about things happening in our culture, if I am on the Dallas Morning News web site, or Fox News, or anyother site, I will often look at the comments just to see what others think. For the last six months, this has become more and more discouraging. On most blogs, people are not using their real names. The things that some of these people say are down right disgusting. They are really not contributing any useful comments or information. It's usually a tirade against a person, organization, or group. I have asked myself many times, "When did we as a people become so mean spirited? Would people say these things if they were not cloaked under anonymity?" I personally don't think they would say these denigrating remarks to someone's face. Needless to say, it has driven me away from looking at these comments.
Some people will throw the First Amendment out that they have the right to speak, but just because a person has a right, they do not have to exercise it. Words should be taken with deep regard and with wisdom and discernment.
One of the scariest verses in the Bible is Matt. 12:36. "But I tell you that men will have to give account on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken." I have said a lot of careless words in my life. I didn't think before I spoke. As I live this year, I want to be very careful of what comes out of my mouth. I want to think before I speak. I want to ask myself, "Is this encouraging or discouraging? Will this build someone up, or will it tear them down?"
Our words are so important, and once they are out there, you cannot bring them back. My favorite American woman poet is Emily Dickinson. She wrote a little poem: "A word is dead when said some say. I say it just begins to live that day." All of us have had things said to us that we have never forgotten. Some have been wonderful and kind things, but we all remember those terribly ugly things said too. Words have the power to slice us to our deepest part.
I cannot control the people who comment on blogs, but I can control whether I choose to read them or not. With one year to live, I am really not too interested in what strangers have to say. I just want to make sure that what comes out of my mouth only builds up and encourages.
Peace,
Sunday, January 22, 2012
Greed
It has been a busy week and a half. Hopefully, I will be more consistent on my entries. God is definitely showing me many lessons in this One Year To Live commitment.
Greed: such a little word, but it packs so much punch. I have thought for years this is the root of all problems. Most people if asked would probably say they don't have a problem with greed, but if we are honest, it is something we all deal with. It just presents itself in different ways, but it always has the same result: the focus is on me!
By definition, greed means wanting more than one's share, or wanting what someone else has. It goes along closely with envy and jealousy. Wars have been started, careers have been ruined, and families have been torn apart because of it. One little word, so much havoc.
There are plenty of examples in the Old and New Testaments of greed. The story of Adam and Eve in the garden has greed at the root. Eve wanted what God had. She wanted to be like God. She wasn't satisfied with the perfect world she had. She just knew she was missing out on something. It didn't work out too well for her. It brought her into the reality of a fallen world. She lost so much in her quest for wanting more. David wanted Bathsheba. She was not his to have, but that did not matter. He even killed to cover up his sin. Religious people of Jesus' day sent Him to the cross. Why? He was exposing them for what they were.
All wars are over greed. Someone wants more or wants all of what someone else has. People for centuries have fought over land, ideaolgies, religion, money, possessions, oil, and the list goes on and on.
People have killed other people over greed. If you don't believe that, just turn on the TV in the morning, and you will hear of people killed overnight because of greed. They robbed a store, they took someone's car, they wanted drugs, etc., etc.
If you really want to see greed, look at our political world. Talk about a "dog eat dog world." It's wanting power, influence, and money, and people will lie, cheat and steal to get what they want.
There has been a lot of talk during the politcal process this year about the wealthy and the rest of the country. Our political leaders have used a weak spot in people to hopefully gain votes. It's us against those rich people. They have all that money. They should share it with the rest of us. Who are they to have all that money while the rest of us have to struggle? People who claim to love this country are driving a wedge between us, and that wedge is greed. They tell us we have a right to demand our fair share.
I have to confess that there have been times in the past that I have complained that we pay athletes and entertainers more than we pay teachers, firefighters, and policemen. "It isn't fair," I would grumble. "What I do is so much more important than what they do!" I complained. "I touch the future!" On and on I would lament.
Talk about self-centered, I was it. It was all about me. I was doing a job I loved, a job I wanted, and I knew going in that I was not going make a lot of money, but that didn't stop my complaining. I wanted more than my share. I wanted what someone else had. It dawned on me one day that I was greedy. I didn't like the sound of it, but it was true. I had to take a really long look at myself, and I certainly did not like what I saw. Thankfully, I serve a loving and forgiving God, who convicted me enough to see myself for what I was: a sinner, who needs His Grace and Forgiveness.
I would like to say from that day on I haven't had any other issues with greed, but that would be a lie, but as I live out this One Year To Live, I know that in the grand scheme, all that matters is not what I have or don't have in this world, but I have what is eternal, and that is a close, personal relationship with Jesus. He is all I need in this world and the next! Praise God for His mercies!
Peace,
Greed: such a little word, but it packs so much punch. I have thought for years this is the root of all problems. Most people if asked would probably say they don't have a problem with greed, but if we are honest, it is something we all deal with. It just presents itself in different ways, but it always has the same result: the focus is on me!
By definition, greed means wanting more than one's share, or wanting what someone else has. It goes along closely with envy and jealousy. Wars have been started, careers have been ruined, and families have been torn apart because of it. One little word, so much havoc.
There are plenty of examples in the Old and New Testaments of greed. The story of Adam and Eve in the garden has greed at the root. Eve wanted what God had. She wanted to be like God. She wasn't satisfied with the perfect world she had. She just knew she was missing out on something. It didn't work out too well for her. It brought her into the reality of a fallen world. She lost so much in her quest for wanting more. David wanted Bathsheba. She was not his to have, but that did not matter. He even killed to cover up his sin. Religious people of Jesus' day sent Him to the cross. Why? He was exposing them for what they were.
All wars are over greed. Someone wants more or wants all of what someone else has. People for centuries have fought over land, ideaolgies, religion, money, possessions, oil, and the list goes on and on.
People have killed other people over greed. If you don't believe that, just turn on the TV in the morning, and you will hear of people killed overnight because of greed. They robbed a store, they took someone's car, they wanted drugs, etc., etc.
If you really want to see greed, look at our political world. Talk about a "dog eat dog world." It's wanting power, influence, and money, and people will lie, cheat and steal to get what they want.
There has been a lot of talk during the politcal process this year about the wealthy and the rest of the country. Our political leaders have used a weak spot in people to hopefully gain votes. It's us against those rich people. They have all that money. They should share it with the rest of us. Who are they to have all that money while the rest of us have to struggle? People who claim to love this country are driving a wedge between us, and that wedge is greed. They tell us we have a right to demand our fair share.
I have to confess that there have been times in the past that I have complained that we pay athletes and entertainers more than we pay teachers, firefighters, and policemen. "It isn't fair," I would grumble. "What I do is so much more important than what they do!" I complained. "I touch the future!" On and on I would lament.
Talk about self-centered, I was it. It was all about me. I was doing a job I loved, a job I wanted, and I knew going in that I was not going make a lot of money, but that didn't stop my complaining. I wanted more than my share. I wanted what someone else had. It dawned on me one day that I was greedy. I didn't like the sound of it, but it was true. I had to take a really long look at myself, and I certainly did not like what I saw. Thankfully, I serve a loving and forgiving God, who convicted me enough to see myself for what I was: a sinner, who needs His Grace and Forgiveness.
I would like to say from that day on I haven't had any other issues with greed, but that would be a lie, but as I live out this One Year To Live, I know that in the grand scheme, all that matters is not what I have or don't have in this world, but I have what is eternal, and that is a close, personal relationship with Jesus. He is all I need in this world and the next! Praise God for His mercies!
Peace,
Wednesday, January 11, 2012
Up Pops the Devil
I knew starting out there would be days like this. I just did not know how I would handle them. January and August are the two most trying months in my job. I work with students of all ages and all backgrounds. I love my job, but as with any job, it has its frustrations. I was hoping to get through this registration without losing my patience. I told myself I was not going to let anything get me off focus from my goal of helping anyone who crossed my path and represent Jesus in everything. I was actually kind of proud of myself. (Oh, there's that PRIDE thing again.) I have been very calm, and even though some around me were flustered and panicking, I was staying on a pretty even keel until today!
The first few students whom I helped today were transfer students from a local college. They had done very poorly there, and they had lost their financial aid and were told to go to a community college because they would be able to receive aid. The more students I helped and heard this, the angrier I became. In my mind I am thinking, "If you weren't successful there, what makes you think you are going to be successful here? What makes you think you are going to get aid here because you have to show satisfactory progress, and there is no way you are going to meet the criteria? Are you interested in an education, or just the money you can get?" You get the idea. Not very nice thoughts, and definitely not the thoughts Jesus would have.
As I was ranting in my mind, I literally heard this voice say, "Who made you the judge and who made you the overseer of whether these students deserve to receive money or not? All I want you to do is be Jesus to them and do your job." It was a very humbling moment because it made me stop and look at myself and realize I was making judgements and being angry about something that really wasn't even any of my business.
I praise God that He disciplines and chastises me when I need it, and I am so thankful for His GRACE and FORGIVENESS when I sin. I pray that I will continue to have ears to hear Him and eyes to see His will for my life.
Blessings,
The first few students whom I helped today were transfer students from a local college. They had done very poorly there, and they had lost their financial aid and were told to go to a community college because they would be able to receive aid. The more students I helped and heard this, the angrier I became. In my mind I am thinking, "If you weren't successful there, what makes you think you are going to be successful here? What makes you think you are going to get aid here because you have to show satisfactory progress, and there is no way you are going to meet the criteria? Are you interested in an education, or just the money you can get?" You get the idea. Not very nice thoughts, and definitely not the thoughts Jesus would have.
As I was ranting in my mind, I literally heard this voice say, "Who made you the judge and who made you the overseer of whether these students deserve to receive money or not? All I want you to do is be Jesus to them and do your job." It was a very humbling moment because it made me stop and look at myself and realize I was making judgements and being angry about something that really wasn't even any of my business.
I praise God that He disciplines and chastises me when I need it, and I am so thankful for His GRACE and FORGIVENESS when I sin. I pray that I will continue to have ears to hear Him and eyes to see His will for my life.
Blessings,
Monday, January 9, 2012
Living a Life of JOY
If you come to visit in my home, you will see many items around my house that have the word JOY on them. They are reminders of how I want to live my life. Years ago at a Ladies Inspiration Day, the speaker talked about JOY. She said that if we put Jesus first, Others second, and Youself last, we will exhibit JOY to all those who cross our paths. This lesson really touched my heart. Number one, it made me look at how self-centered I really was. I gave lip service to putting Jesus first, but at that point in my life, Jesus got the leftovers. I tried to do for others, but only if it was convenient for me. Pretty much, I was mostly me centered. I wanted what I wanted when I wanted it, and would get pretty upset if things did not go my way.
I love how God has a way of slapping me with a dose of reality. I love that He does not leave me in my delusion that I am the center of my universe. Through some very painful, eye opening experiences, God showed me that it is not all about me, and that if I truly want to experience JOY , I had to put Him in the center of my life, and come to see others as He sees them, and relegate me to end of the line.
Do I still get out of focus? You bet I do. If I start fretting and feeling like I am living in chaos, it usually means I have become very self consumed. It means I have taken my eyes off of Him and off those hurting around me. I love Hebrews 12:2. "Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfector of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God."
I want this verse to be at the forefront of my one year to live. I do not want to be self consumed. I want to be Jesus consumed, and through Him be consumed with a mindfulness of the lost and hurting around me, and with His love and guidance and speaking the truth in love, show others the JOY that comes from knowing Him and having a deep, personal relationship with Him. He is the true source of JOY. May I always remember that.
Peace,
I love how God has a way of slapping me with a dose of reality. I love that He does not leave me in my delusion that I am the center of my universe. Through some very painful, eye opening experiences, God showed me that it is not all about me, and that if I truly want to experience JOY , I had to put Him in the center of my life, and come to see others as He sees them, and relegate me to end of the line.
Do I still get out of focus? You bet I do. If I start fretting and feeling like I am living in chaos, it usually means I have become very self consumed. It means I have taken my eyes off of Him and off those hurting around me. I love Hebrews 12:2. "Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfector of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God."
I want this verse to be at the forefront of my one year to live. I do not want to be self consumed. I want to be Jesus consumed, and through Him be consumed with a mindfulness of the lost and hurting around me, and with His love and guidance and speaking the truth in love, show others the JOY that comes from knowing Him and having a deep, personal relationship with Him. He is the true source of JOY. May I always remember that.
Peace,
Sunday, January 8, 2012
Who is watching?
I hope that I can be aware this year of who is watching me. I know that God is always watching me even though I don't always live like I know that. I cringe when I think about how I reacted in certain situations. I certainly did not act like I knew God was watching me. My body language, the things that came out of my mouth, my attitude certainly did not represent Christ in a positive way. I reacted to the frustration of the moment instead of stepping back and composing myself before I opened my mouth. For the ones who took the brunt of those outburst, I can only imagine what they thought of me.
This idea really came home to me yesterday. I was in a setting where I only knew the people I was with. I was in a huge crowd that was quite rowdy and honestly quite rude. I thought to myself they have no idea the impressions that they were making on those of us who were observing them. They might be fellow Christians, they might be really kind and caring people, but because of their behavior, they will be remembered as being crass, disrespectful, and rude.
It doesn't matter where we are, someone is always watching us, and we are leaving either a positive impression or a negative. You might say, "What difference does it make what someone else thinks?" But if we are to be a lights in this dark world and if we are to be ambassadors for Christ, shouldn't we be cognizant of what lasting imprint we might be leaving?
Think about your encounters with people at the grocery store. What did you think when you saw a mom who yelled at her kids, the person in front of you who was unkind to the cashier, the child that was disrespectful to his/her mother, or the dad that spanked the crying child for crying? We all have been witnesses to acts like these, and right or wrong, we formed some kind of an opinion about the people involved.
This year as I live out OYTL, I want to have a constant awareness that someone is watching me. I want that to radically impact how I act and react publically and privately because, afterall, God is constantly watching over everything I do.
Blessings,
This idea really came home to me yesterday. I was in a setting where I only knew the people I was with. I was in a huge crowd that was quite rowdy and honestly quite rude. I thought to myself they have no idea the impressions that they were making on those of us who were observing them. They might be fellow Christians, they might be really kind and caring people, but because of their behavior, they will be remembered as being crass, disrespectful, and rude.
It doesn't matter where we are, someone is always watching us, and we are leaving either a positive impression or a negative. You might say, "What difference does it make what someone else thinks?" But if we are to be a lights in this dark world and if we are to be ambassadors for Christ, shouldn't we be cognizant of what lasting imprint we might be leaving?
Think about your encounters with people at the grocery store. What did you think when you saw a mom who yelled at her kids, the person in front of you who was unkind to the cashier, the child that was disrespectful to his/her mother, or the dad that spanked the crying child for crying? We all have been witnesses to acts like these, and right or wrong, we formed some kind of an opinion about the people involved.
This year as I live out OYTL, I want to have a constant awareness that someone is watching me. I want that to radically impact how I act and react publically and privately because, afterall, God is constantly watching over everything I do.
Blessings,
Sunday, January 1, 2012
One Year to Live
The minister where I attend church has challenged us to live 2012 as if we only have one year to live, and because no one is promised a tomorrow, much less another year, I have taken on this challenge. I will be writing about what God shows me as I go through the year, and I will write about the challenges that the devil puts in my path. I have thought a lot about this over the month of December. What would it look like if I were given the diagnosis of one year to live? I actually have friends who have heard those words.
I am committed to being in God's Word everyday. I want to be as close to Him as possible, and that has to come through being in His Word. I also intend to spend a lot of time in prayer.
I want to spend time with my family and friends and make memories. They are the ones who have carried me through some of the hardest challenges of my life.
I am committed to speaking the truth in love in all circumstances. So many times, I don't say what really needs to be said because I am afraid I will hurt someone or make them angry, but not dealing with issues will never make them go away. As a matter of fact, in most cases it will only make things worse because eventually the truth will have to be spoken. Truth is the only way to deal with things. I need people in my life who will tell me the truth, even when I don't want to hear it.
In this "last year to live" I want to show Jesus to everyone who crosses my path.
I don't know what this challenge is going to look like, and I have no idea what this year holds, but I trust and know who holds it all in the palm of HIS hand. He will always be faithful even when I am not and when I falter.
So today on January 1, 2012 God has already shown me something powerful. I am a huge Dallas Mavericks fan. I get so caught up in the games. I lose sleep over a loss, and I worry and fret about whether they are going to play well or not. Tonight as I was watching the game, I realized that if I only have one year to live that this is really going to be low on my priority list. Yes, it will be a good diversion to take my mind off my limited number of days, but in the grand scheme, there is nothing eternal about it. I need to keep it in perspective.
Peace and blessings
I am committed to being in God's Word everyday. I want to be as close to Him as possible, and that has to come through being in His Word. I also intend to spend a lot of time in prayer.
I want to spend time with my family and friends and make memories. They are the ones who have carried me through some of the hardest challenges of my life.
I am committed to speaking the truth in love in all circumstances. So many times, I don't say what really needs to be said because I am afraid I will hurt someone or make them angry, but not dealing with issues will never make them go away. As a matter of fact, in most cases it will only make things worse because eventually the truth will have to be spoken. Truth is the only way to deal with things. I need people in my life who will tell me the truth, even when I don't want to hear it.
In this "last year to live" I want to show Jesus to everyone who crosses my path.
I don't know what this challenge is going to look like, and I have no idea what this year holds, but I trust and know who holds it all in the palm of HIS hand. He will always be faithful even when I am not and when I falter.
So today on January 1, 2012 God has already shown me something powerful. I am a huge Dallas Mavericks fan. I get so caught up in the games. I lose sleep over a loss, and I worry and fret about whether they are going to play well or not. Tonight as I was watching the game, I realized that if I only have one year to live that this is really going to be low on my priority list. Yes, it will be a good diversion to take my mind off my limited number of days, but in the grand scheme, there is nothing eternal about it. I need to keep it in perspective.
Peace and blessings
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